On Legacy and Relentlessness

There's this story that I like to tell people about the Egyptian idea of a Second Death. That when a person dies, that's their first death. But their second death is when somebody says their name for the last time. This idea struck me so intensely because a part of me feels like it's true. Great people in the past will live forever because of their deeds, their names repeated ad infinium until the end of eternity. Every person they've touched, all the lives they've affected. In my eyes, immortality is attainable.

When I look back at history, names that pop out to me are always people of strong character: Caesar, Napoleon, Jesus, Kojima, Miyamoto, Kanye. They were fighters that stood up for what they believed in. Their passion pushed them to achieve not only greatness, but eternal life. Their stories are told and passed on to every person on Earth, their influence only grows. Sure, their stories may have gotten muddled along the way, details lost in time, but that only helps the legends grow into myths.

Nowadays, people believe what they want to believe. Nobody is telling them what's right and what's wrong, they have to figure that out for themselves. If not, they turn to the most reliable source of information, the public forum. Nobody wants to be perceived as wrong, it's social suicide! Scour around the net a bit, pick up on the zeitgeist and share away. People love being told they're right, so we spew whatever witty zinger we ctrl-c'd from Twitter and wait for the likes to pour in.

But that's not for me. I'm not saying it's bad to do those things; but the way I see it, it's not really a way to get noticed. I mean, sure we can share and post all we want to -maybe- change the way the people around us think; but it doesn't really seem that effective. People don't want to be told they're wrong, remember? Nobody's gonna suddenly wanna go vegan just because they saw a disgusting picture of a maltreated cow on their news feed. It might work for some people, but I'd usually just unfriend you.

Reposting the same old stuff is just normal behavior. It's accepted. It's acceptable. But I'm not the type of guy to fade away into the background. I wanna be remembered for something more than the epic memes I post on my wall.

I always wondered if great men (and women) thought about achieving greatness. Did they know that one day, they'd be remembered for their amazing deeds. Did they intentionally commit themselves to a specific goal, knowing that they would be written and talked about centuries later by people that probably won't even understand why they did those things in the first place? Does it even matter that people remember what they died for, as long as people knew that they died for something?

Caesar isn't remembered for being just another guy. Jesus didn't sit idly by and spew out whatever rhetoric was popular at the time. These guys were different, unafraid to stand out and be noticed. Even the way I'm using their names now extends their lives just a little bit. You, the reader, probably have some notion of who these guys are that I don't know anything about; but because I'm repeating their names to you, evokes an image in your head that makes you remember them, what you believe they stood for. It doesn't matter that I'm not getting into the specifics of their actual roles in history, the mere fact that they've become household names is a testament to how influential they are.

I've always wanted to leave a legacy, something for people to remember me by. Be it creating an awesome game, or maybe an awesome company. I've always told myself that I'm working hard for the ability to look back and say that I did work hard. Like how now I can tell stories about how hard I worked in college. Yeyuh. I worked really freaking hard, by the way.

A legacy is more than just immortality, it's a monument to the things that you've achieved in your life. All of the tiny accumulated accomplishments all build up to the interactive resume you'll post on your iTomb for when your great-grandkids visit decades after you've passed away. It's what future VRoggers will be reading when they look up your name on Wikipedia and postulate what role you played.

It's also building a bright future for our kids. Creating a world where they'd be comfortable being themselves and not pressured to do anything that they don't want to do. I mean, isn't that all we want for our kids? Look at me, I'm thinking way into the future again. But isn't that what we should be doing anyway?

What am I trying to get at here? I don't know, maybe I'm trying to get at my restlessness. I often struggle trying to relax and take a breath. I can't really pinpoint why. It's like I can't sit down for a few seconds without wondering, "What am I doing?" Breaks make me feel listless, I can't stand not being productive. I'm always working hard because I told myself to work hard. I put myself out there all the time because I know that eventually, it'll pay off. I mean, it's very fulfilling to go and do something that you love.

Maybe that's it. I love working. I guess I can say that I'm a workaholic? I mean, I'm chasing my dream. I'm working in my dream industry. To be honest, I'm having a lot of fun at the internship I'm at right now and I'm learning so much.

My parents always told me, "Do what you love and you'll never work a day."

It makes so much sense, because why would you do something that you -don't- love? Videogames are my passion and being thrust into this engaging world of interesting people and amazing experiences is more than anyone could ever ask for. I feel so blessed to have such amazing parents that love me and support me in my pursuit of my dream. I was given all of these chances and all of these doors have been opened for me, and now my challenge is to make the most out of it; to not let these blessings go to waste.

Because of this, I've made it my goal to be remembered. That I can be an example for generations to come. That when pushed to pursue your passions, you'll be capable of doing great things. To leave a legacy of someone who is unafraid to put himself out there and follow his dreams.

I mean, yeah you'll see me post an occasional meme or something, but that's just because I'm a victim of the times! And Caesar probably shared the dankest memes.